DRUNK HUBBY IS VIOLENT MONSTER

DEAR Jane: I'm desperate to leave my violent, drunk husband but I’m terrified that he’ll kill me first.

He once said that if he couldn’t have me, then no-one would.

His business is currently in free-fall. He’s haemorrhaging money and we could lose the house. Consequently he’s very angry, unpredictable and scary.

Most nights he storms home after 9pm, completely drunk out of his skull. He goes crazy if the children are still up, I’ve got visitors or the house isn’t tidy.

The other night my neighbour dropped by unannounced to warn me about a spate of burglaries in the area.

I was like a cat on a hot tin roof. I couldn’t risk her seeing him – and vice versa.

As the clock ticked closer to 9pm, I suddenly sprang up and said: “You’ve got to leave,” and literally pushed her out the door.

She was furious and said that I was very rude. She’s probably telling all our neighbours that I’m an ungrateful bitch.

But what choice did I have? Finally my husband staggered in and went ape because a bank statement showed I’d spent £40 on a pair of trainers for our son.

I tried to explain that the boy had outgrown his old ones but he slapped me across the head and accused me of trying to ruin us.

I fled to bed and pretended to be asleep. But, of course, he still demanded sex.

I understand and accept that he’s a deeply troubled man with a million worries on his mind. He’s got five blokes working for him who all have families.

But the worse things get, the more abusive he is to me.

My family say I should call the police and have him removed. But what if he then went on to kill himself? How would I live with that? What would I tell the kids?

His own mother says I should kick him out. She dumped his father for being drunk and abusive back in 2000. But it’s not that easy for me.

JANE SAYS: You must start putting your family’s safety first.

Think about yourself and your children. If your troubled husband is now knocking you about and frightening your kids, then he’s got to be removed. No excuses. Out.

It’s very sad that his business is struggling but that doesn’t earn him the right to be abusive and threatening towards anyone.

Why is your situation any different to your mother-in-law’s? Why can’t you phone the police and call time on him?

If you’re secretly worried about keeping up appearances and putting on a certain act for your neighbours and his employees, then don’t.

This is not the time for worrying about other people – you’ve got to put yourself first before he kills you.

As for him committing suicide, that’s not your concern. You aren’t responsible for his actions.

Please call The National Domestic Violence Helpline (0808 2000 247) now for help.

» MORE 'JUST JANE' HERE...

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